How not to become mother to the husband

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 One of the most widespread mistakes of married women – excessive, almost maternal guardianship over the spouse. Often it leads to destruction of the love relations therefore the man gets an extramarital affair or in general leaves family. Not to allow such outcome, the wife should not be for the husband "careful mummy".

Instruction

1. It is not necessary to do what he is capable to cope independently with for the man: to choose and buy clothes without his permission, to tie to it a tie, to watch appearance, etc. It would seem, in it and the wife's duties consist, however in his childhood mother quite so arrived therefore in subconsciousness such actions are associated with maternal care. Certainly, the husband can give unostentatious advice, but only when he about it asks.

2. Do not look for to the husband work at all! So you not only will appear mummy who will solve all problems, but also will kill him a self-assessment, self-confidence and own solvency.

3. Do not talk to the man as the child: "Did you get hungry? Do you want to soup?", "You warmly put on? Put on one more sweater! Look, you will freeze!". In the same way once mother spoke, and now her image is projected on the wife. Besides, you should not lecture it, especially at children: he will feel like one more of your child. Just express discontent it with an act as would make it with the fellow worker, the neighbor or the acquaintance.

4. If the husband shows an initiative, for example, undertakes to make a lunch whereas its culinary abilities are far from perfect, do not kill it on a root: "You incorrectly cut carrots! There now, zalyapat all plate, and to me to wipe! Leave, I will make everything!". Another time he will hardly want to make to you pleasant because "mummy" lecturing it as the innocent kid will be always on the mind.

5. Your husband – the adult, he has to care for the family therefore do not remind him of what he knows and remembers: "Do not forget to take out garbage!", "Do not forget to buy bread!". If to act this way it is regular, then the man will dare to be forgetful and irresponsible: "You did not remind, I also did not make, itself is guilty". Such behavior is admissible for the teenager, but not for the husband and the father of family.

6. Trust the man in everything. You should not underestimate its abilities, to charge with efforts only yourself or to control each its step. Your husband is able to organize family holiday, to buy gifts to parents, to resolve issues at school where children study. You treat it as to the reliable person competent of all questions on whom you can rely completely.

7. Do not undertake an obligation for education of the husband with which as it seems to you, his mother did not cope at the time. Accept and love the man it what he is, and he surely will estimate it.

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